self

I have been reading Piper lately. 'Don't Waste Your Life' specifically. It's really a challenging book, not the reading per se but the concepts. I think it could be one of those life changing books - we shall see where God takes it in me. Any way - that among other things - is really challenging me to stop thinking about myself so much.

I spend too many thoughts on me and not enough on the Lord. I spend too many moments on me and not enough serving the Lord. My heart spends too much love on things that do not matter. My soul is too focused on my flesh and not nearly enough on worship.

My thoughts are trained on how I feel, how am I doing. Instead they should be on what the Lord feels and what the Lord's will is. I spend my time seeking the next thing that will make me comfortable, or the next distraction, or the next escape. Instead of turning to the Lord and asking what His desires for me are, and what His will for this hour may be. My heart wants to be filled with useless things like TV, and food, and pleasure. Instead I should be seeking the Lord's heart for me - and letting His love fill me up and satisfy me. And when I pray my soul is before the Lord, but I am there to be blessed rather than give the Lord a blessing.

I am broken. How can I fill my mind with worship Lord - when my mind is so filled with me? Please free me from this mess - teach me to be abandoned to your praise.