How do I give myself to the Lord like that? How do I give Him all? How do I walk naked before Him - reserving nothing for myself? How do I stand always at the edge of the cliff waiting and open? Am I even able to do this - as I feel like you are calling me Father? I hear you calling me, I feel you pulling me there! I am so frightened and yet so exhilarated!
I started reading Absolute Surrender by Andrew Murray last night before bed. He was a contemporary of Hudson Taylor living in South Africa as a writer and pastor. I am only a couple pages in and already I am overwhelmed...
He writes "... the condition of God's blessing is absolute surrender of all into His hands"
"I have come with a message to those who are fearful and anxious. God does not ask you to give the perfect surrender in your strength, or by the power of your will; God is willing to work it in you."
Phil 2:13
For God is working in you, giving you the desire to obey Him and the power to do what pleases Him.
Hudson Taylor wrote that even when we are faithless - He abides faithful ....
So if we are joined in Him, united into His body, one with Him, complete in Christ, sealed with the Holy Spirit, hidden with Christ in God - then even when we are faithless - He is faithful enough for us all and I need not worry - He will not allow me to be put to shame. He will do the faith providing. He will give all that is necessary.
God I am not faithful, I am weak and small, I am tired and worn out, I am powerless. But in You I am filled with all faith, I am strong, I am an heir, I am full of energy, I am new, I am filled with power. I am one with You. May I surrender everything to You.
May I weep at your feet, washing your feet with my hair, praising your name - willing to sacrifice all that is precious to me. It scares me to write that - to have it out there - as if having it in print makes it more true. But that is what I want Lord. I want to worship you with everything that I am.
Showing posts with label Hudson Taylor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hudson Taylor. Show all posts
Sunday, November 27, 2011
hudson taylor
I have finished Hudson Taylor's biography, it was excellent. But not because it was written so well or anything like that ... it's because He poured out his whole life to the Lord. Nothing was held back, not his wife, not his kids, nothing in his own life, not his own finances, sleep, time - all was given up - gladly to the Lord.
Here are some of the gems:
They would hear a match stuck (even after the most horrible days of travel or struggle) and see the flicker of candlelight which told that Mr. Taylor, however weary, was pouring over the Bible in 2 volumes always at hand. From 2 to 4 am was the time He usually gave to prayer; the time he could be most assured of being undisturbed to wait upon God.
Turning back, Mr Nichol could not help exclaiming " How can you whistle, when our friends are in so much danger?!" " Would you have me anxious and troubled? " was his quiet reply. " That would not help them, and would certainly incapacitate me for my work. I have just to roll the burden on the Lord."
He abideth faithful and cannot deny Himself. If we are really trusting in Him and seeking from Him, we cannot be put to shame.
Surrender to Christ he had long known, this was something more; this was a new yieldedness, a glad, unreserved handing over of self and everything to Him. It was no longer a question of giving up this or that if the Lord required it; it was a loyal and loving acceptance, a joyful meeting of His will in things little and great, as the very best that could be for His own.
There is a needs-be for us to give ourselves for the life of the world. An easy non-self-denying life will never be one of power. Fruit-bearing involves cross-bearing. There are not 2 Christs - an easy going one for easy going Christians, and a suffering, toiling one for exceptional believers. There is only one Christ. Are you willing to abide in Him and thus bear much fruit?
Wow - and that is only some of it!
I am blown away by the faith God gave to this man.
How I long for such a faith yet feel so unprepared for the trial and suffering that come with it. I guess he was not prepared either ... but oh how he welcomed whatever came from the Lord - as gain. Even when his daughter died, then a son died, even when his wife and newborn child were taken by the Lord, he wept in joy. All was for His glory.
Here are some of the gems:
They would hear a match stuck (even after the most horrible days of travel or struggle) and see the flicker of candlelight which told that Mr. Taylor, however weary, was pouring over the Bible in 2 volumes always at hand. From 2 to 4 am was the time He usually gave to prayer; the time he could be most assured of being undisturbed to wait upon God.
Turning back, Mr Nichol could not help exclaiming " How can you whistle, when our friends are in so much danger?!" " Would you have me anxious and troubled? " was his quiet reply. " That would not help them, and would certainly incapacitate me for my work. I have just to roll the burden on the Lord."
He abideth faithful and cannot deny Himself. If we are really trusting in Him and seeking from Him, we cannot be put to shame.
Surrender to Christ he had long known, this was something more; this was a new yieldedness, a glad, unreserved handing over of self and everything to Him. It was no longer a question of giving up this or that if the Lord required it; it was a loyal and loving acceptance, a joyful meeting of His will in things little and great, as the very best that could be for His own.
There is a needs-be for us to give ourselves for the life of the world. An easy non-self-denying life will never be one of power. Fruit-bearing involves cross-bearing. There are not 2 Christs - an easy going one for easy going Christians, and a suffering, toiling one for exceptional believers. There is only one Christ. Are you willing to abide in Him and thus bear much fruit?
Wow - and that is only some of it!
I am blown away by the faith God gave to this man.
How I long for such a faith yet feel so unprepared for the trial and suffering that come with it. I guess he was not prepared either ... but oh how he welcomed whatever came from the Lord - as gain. Even when his daughter died, then a son died, even when his wife and newborn child were taken by the Lord, he wept in joy. All was for His glory.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
a better plan
I have been going back and forth in a conversation with myself and others about God's sovereignty and our responsibility/free will. I know it is an never-ending circle - no one can ever win this argument. As soon as you argue too much on one side - you lose too much on the other. In the end it is a both/and. God is sovereign and yet somehow we are free to choose. Most of our conversation has been about prayer - does faith play a part, do I need to pray, do my prayers make a difference.... etc.
For me though, God's sovereignty was never in question - I do believe He is in control of all things - and is weaving together all things for His glory and our highest good and joy. My problem is knowing just what my responsibility is. We are called to be co-laborers, not to harden our hearts, to ask, and pray, be persistent, to persevere in prayer, and express our faith - what does all of that mean , look like? Why, what is it all for - if He knows the end - and has control over the end - how do we participate in all of it?
I don't know... my greatest thought on all of it is that somehow in our finite portion of life - it matters. And besides all of that He has commanded us in all these things. So I can either choose to obey and step out in faith and expect Him to lead me along just like He says He will - trusting His character, or I can sit back and do nothing and miss out on being a part of what He is doing.
Either way there will be suffering - that's what this life offers in the end ... but if I am willing to suffer along with Jesus - in whatever He may choose for me - I can experience His mercy, grace, and joy in all of that suffering. The latter sounds like a better plan to me.
As I have gone around and around on this, a theme has kept coming up - a friend put into just the right words for me ... we are spiritually lazy. We have not be doing our part - however meager it may be. We are called to pray, to persist, to have amazing faith, to not harden our hearts, to persevere in prayer, to sacrifice, to speak out the truth, to evangelize - the list could go on forever ... and we simply are not doing it enough. We are not stepping out in faith trusting that God will supply the things that we need in whatever He has called us to. In fact we are not even listening to the call. We are not putting ourselves before Him listening for our call to action. We are not willing to be fools for Him, we are not willing to sacrifice our time, sleep, tv, food, or whatever - to pray, pray and pray some more and then go and do the things He has called us to.
I have been reading a book - Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret. I just started reading it yesterday and already I am struck by his amazing faith. His total willingness to sacrifice, and sacrifice, and sacrifice for the Lord. He lived utterly on faith - it's almost ridiculous to read - I can hardly believe its true! He always expected the Lord to show up and do amazing things - and God did. I have never seen faith like this - I have never known anyone that has lived this kind of poured out life.
It makes me want to pray a lot more. It makes me want to give up more of my crap and be free from it. It makes me want to sacrifice time, food, pleasure - all of those things to see more of the Lord. It makes me want to have more faith - so God can do even more amazing things through me.
For me though, God's sovereignty was never in question - I do believe He is in control of all things - and is weaving together all things for His glory and our highest good and joy. My problem is knowing just what my responsibility is. We are called to be co-laborers, not to harden our hearts, to ask, and pray, be persistent, to persevere in prayer, and express our faith - what does all of that mean , look like? Why, what is it all for - if He knows the end - and has control over the end - how do we participate in all of it?
I don't know... my greatest thought on all of it is that somehow in our finite portion of life - it matters. And besides all of that He has commanded us in all these things. So I can either choose to obey and step out in faith and expect Him to lead me along just like He says He will - trusting His character, or I can sit back and do nothing and miss out on being a part of what He is doing.
Either way there will be suffering - that's what this life offers in the end ... but if I am willing to suffer along with Jesus - in whatever He may choose for me - I can experience His mercy, grace, and joy in all of that suffering. The latter sounds like a better plan to me.
As I have gone around and around on this, a theme has kept coming up - a friend put into just the right words for me ... we are spiritually lazy. We have not be doing our part - however meager it may be. We are called to pray, to persist, to have amazing faith, to not harden our hearts, to persevere in prayer, to sacrifice, to speak out the truth, to evangelize - the list could go on forever ... and we simply are not doing it enough. We are not stepping out in faith trusting that God will supply the things that we need in whatever He has called us to. In fact we are not even listening to the call. We are not putting ourselves before Him listening for our call to action. We are not willing to be fools for Him, we are not willing to sacrifice our time, sleep, tv, food, or whatever - to pray, pray and pray some more and then go and do the things He has called us to.
I have been reading a book - Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret. I just started reading it yesterday and already I am struck by his amazing faith. His total willingness to sacrifice, and sacrifice, and sacrifice for the Lord. He lived utterly on faith - it's almost ridiculous to read - I can hardly believe its true! He always expected the Lord to show up and do amazing things - and God did. I have never seen faith like this - I have never known anyone that has lived this kind of poured out life.
It makes me want to pray a lot more. It makes me want to give up more of my crap and be free from it. It makes me want to sacrifice time, food, pleasure - all of those things to see more of the Lord. It makes me want to have more faith - so God can do even more amazing things through me.
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