Romans 6
Well then, should we keep on sinning so that God can show us more and more of his wonderful grace? 2 Of course not! Since we have died to sin, how can we continue to live in it? 3 Or have you forgotten that when we were joined with Christ Jesus in baptism, we joined him in his death? 4 For we died and were buried with Christ by baptism. And just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glorious power of the Father, now we also may live new lives.
I do not want to keep sinning. And yet something in my flesh keeps winning the day. If I am in fact dead to sin - why do I keep living in it? I don't know - but I do know that I am fed up with myself in the area of food and food addiction. I keep hearing the Lord say ... 'Be satisfied with less food - be satisfied with more of me' ... I so want that until my stomach even grumbles a little and I am back in the kitchen looking for a little more. How can this passage be true of me? How can I have resurrection power at my disposal and yet feel so powerless when I am hungry.
5 Since we have been united with him in his death, we will also be raised to life as he was. 6 We know that our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. 7 For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin. 8 And since we died with Christ, we know we will also live with him. 9 We are sure of this because Christ was raised from the dead, and he will never die again. Death no longer has any power over him. 10 When he died, he died once to break the power of sin. But now that he lives, he lives for the glory of God. 11 So you also should consider yourselves to be dead to the power of sin and alive to God through Christ Jesus.
Alive to God through Christ Jesus. Consider myself dead. I am united with Him in His death ... and raised to new life with Him. This is what is true. I hear and understand the words - and some part of me believes that this is not just true - but true of me. And yet... and yet ... I am stuck. So stuck in the same sin over and over again. I am set free from the power of sin ... and yet I am still stuck. What does it mean that I should consider myself dead to the power of sin? because like I said - I believe that - yet - I am still sinning.
12 Do not let sin control the way you live; do not give in to sinful desires. 13 Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God. 14 Sin is no longer your master, for you no longer live under the requirements of the law. Instead, you live under the freedom of God’s grace.
Do not give into sinful desires... this has to be an act of God in me. I can not conjure this up in myself. There is no part of my flesh that can be good enough to walk in this truth. So there is the new creature - the new me - the new heart that is given to me - where Christ resides - where the Spirit lives. So why do I not automatically then do what my new nature desires? If Christ and the Spirit are within me - are they not more powerful than this sin? They are! I know that much is true - but then why is this still such a mess? I have asked the Lord to come and make my flesh obey - confessed my sin a million times - asked Him to bring Him more glory ... yet each time I walk in the kitchen - my flesh is the thing that takes over. Damn you flesh! I want my body to obey - I want my body to be and instrument of righteousness. I want to bring glory to God!
15 Well then, since God’s grace has set us free from the law, does that mean we can go on sinning? Of course not! 16 Don’t you realize that you become the slave of whatever you choose to obey? You can be a slave to sin, which leads to death, or you can choose to obey God, which leads to righteous living. 17 Thank God! Once you were slaves of sin, but now you wholeheartedly obey this teaching we have given you. 18 Now you are free from your slavery to sin, and you have become slaves to righteous living.
I don't want to sin! I don't want to be a slave to my hunger, or my stomach, or my food addiction, or my sin. How do I choose to obey? I want to be a slave to righteous living! a slave to God!
19 Because of the weakness of your human nature, I am using the illustration of slavery to help you understand all this. Previously, you let yourselves be slaves to impurity and lawlessness, which led ever deeper into sin. Now you must give yourselves to be slaves to righteous living so that you will become holy.
God I give myself - everything over to You and your righteousness. Make me holy like you are.
20 When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the obligation to do right. 21 And what was the result? You are now ashamed of the things you used to do, things that end in eternal doom. 22 But now you are free from the power of sin and have become slaves of God. Now you do those things that lead to holiness and result in eternal life. 23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.
Make me do the things that lead to holiness and result in eternal work. I want to bring You honor and glory. This sin pattern is old and tired ... I am ready for victory. Put to death the deeds of this flesh and enliven me to righteousness! I present myself to You... Teach my heart, soul, mind, and body to love You and to rest in the truth of this Word. Fill me with Your fullness!
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
psalm 81
I read Psalm 81 randomly the other day ... ( and this is what God did in me )
Sing praises to God, our strength.
Sing to the God of Jacob.
Sing! Beat the tambourine.
Play the sweet lyre and the harp.
Blow the ram’s horn at new moon,
and again at full moon to call a festival!
For this is required by the decrees of Israel;
it is a regulation of the God of Jacob.
He made it a law for Israel
when he attacked Egypt to set us free.
( I read these verses and said 'Yes - I want to throw a festival - I want to sing and dance to God ... God, how I am longing for you to set me free like this! To be wild and dance and sing like David when the ark came back to Jerusalem! )
I heard an unknown voice say,
“Now I will take the load from your shoulders;
I will free your hands from their heavy tasks.
You cried to me in trouble, and I saved you;
I answered out of the thundercloud
and tested your faith when there was no water at Meribah.
( The unknown voice is the Lord's voice ... a voice I did not know clearly just a few years before.
And He is declaring that He will remove 'the load from my shoulders' ... and I felt the Lord saying... soon I will free you from your shoulder and back pain.
'I will free your hands from their heavy tasks' - and I felt the Lord saying ... the sword you have been carrying - the one I just recently told you was in your hand - the one that has been there since you helped begin this church - which is a burden of pain you share with me - it is the one that is causing your neck and shoulder pain! - that one - you soon will be able to set it down - and take a rest!
You said 'I have cried to you in trouble' ... this blog is a testament - but also you brought to my mind - the other night I cried out to you God and let myself go and admit all of my pain from this waiting.
You 'answered in the thundercloud' - indeed You have shown me this as a theme of your rescue this season as in Psalm 18 - you come on the storm to rescue!
And 'You tested my faith - when there has been no water' ... You Lord have said that You will come and fill me with streams of Living Water - the River of Life flowing out of me, through me, and for me - this has been my prayer .... All of this the Lord poured out on me as I read... )
Interlude
“Listen to me, O my people, while I give you stern warnings.
O Israel, if you would only listen to me!
You must never have a foreign god;
you must not bow down before a false god.
For it was I, the Lord your God,
who rescued you from the land of Egypt.
Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it with good things.
( I want to be filled with good things! Help me open my mouth wide to receive from You alone, God! Help me to shed off all of my sin of gluttony - and anything else that stands in the way - put to death the deeds of my flesh by the power of Your Spirit!)
“But no, my people wouldn’t listen.
Israel did not want me around.
So I let them follow their own stubborn desires,
living according to their own ideas.
Oh, that my people would listen to me!
Oh, that Israel would follow me, walking in my paths!
How quickly I would then subdue their enemies!
How soon my hands would be upon their foes!
Those who hate the Lord would cringe before him;
they would be doomed forever.
But I would feed you with the finest wheat.
I would satisfy you with wild honey from the rock.”
( I have been guilty of this kind of unbelief, Father! But no more - cleanse me! and cleanse Your people of all of their unbelief. Come and rescue us from ourselves - come and wake us up - so we can hear - so we can obey! We need you to come and take care of the enemy - rescue us! And feed us - satisfy us with YOU - fill us with the bread of your word, the sweetness of your company - You - our ROCK! )
Sing praises to God, our strength.
Sing to the God of Jacob.
Sing! Beat the tambourine.
Play the sweet lyre and the harp.
Blow the ram’s horn at new moon,
and again at full moon to call a festival!
For this is required by the decrees of Israel;
it is a regulation of the God of Jacob.
He made it a law for Israel
when he attacked Egypt to set us free.
( I read these verses and said 'Yes - I want to throw a festival - I want to sing and dance to God ... God, how I am longing for you to set me free like this! To be wild and dance and sing like David when the ark came back to Jerusalem! )
I heard an unknown voice say,
“Now I will take the load from your shoulders;
I will free your hands from their heavy tasks.
You cried to me in trouble, and I saved you;
I answered out of the thundercloud
and tested your faith when there was no water at Meribah.
( The unknown voice is the Lord's voice ... a voice I did not know clearly just a few years before.
And He is declaring that He will remove 'the load from my shoulders' ... and I felt the Lord saying... soon I will free you from your shoulder and back pain.
'I will free your hands from their heavy tasks' - and I felt the Lord saying ... the sword you have been carrying - the one I just recently told you was in your hand - the one that has been there since you helped begin this church - which is a burden of pain you share with me - it is the one that is causing your neck and shoulder pain! - that one - you soon will be able to set it down - and take a rest!
You said 'I have cried to you in trouble' ... this blog is a testament - but also you brought to my mind - the other night I cried out to you God and let myself go and admit all of my pain from this waiting.
You 'answered in the thundercloud' - indeed You have shown me this as a theme of your rescue this season as in Psalm 18 - you come on the storm to rescue!
And 'You tested my faith - when there has been no water' ... You Lord have said that You will come and fill me with streams of Living Water - the River of Life flowing out of me, through me, and for me - this has been my prayer .... All of this the Lord poured out on me as I read... )
Interlude
“Listen to me, O my people, while I give you stern warnings.
O Israel, if you would only listen to me!
You must never have a foreign god;
you must not bow down before a false god.
For it was I, the Lord your God,
who rescued you from the land of Egypt.
Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it with good things.
( I want to be filled with good things! Help me open my mouth wide to receive from You alone, God! Help me to shed off all of my sin of gluttony - and anything else that stands in the way - put to death the deeds of my flesh by the power of Your Spirit!)
“But no, my people wouldn’t listen.
Israel did not want me around.
So I let them follow their own stubborn desires,
living according to their own ideas.
Oh, that my people would listen to me!
Oh, that Israel would follow me, walking in my paths!
How quickly I would then subdue their enemies!
How soon my hands would be upon their foes!
Those who hate the Lord would cringe before him;
they would be doomed forever.
But I would feed you with the finest wheat.
I would satisfy you with wild honey from the rock.”
( I have been guilty of this kind of unbelief, Father! But no more - cleanse me! and cleanse Your people of all of their unbelief. Come and rescue us from ourselves - come and wake us up - so we can hear - so we can obey! We need you to come and take care of the enemy - rescue us! And feed us - satisfy us with YOU - fill us with the bread of your word, the sweetness of your company - You - our ROCK! )
Friday, November 9, 2012
resurrection
I just finished reading a friend's book. It was well written and full of his heart. I can tell He put so much into it - choosing every word so carefully and plotting his arguments so well. But in the end it was incomplete. There was no Jesus in the book ... and especially no resurrection of Jesus.
What good is a discussion of any problem - if we are left with no solution. Jesus came to tell us we are indeed sinners who have walked away from God but He came with the solution! He came to die on the cross and kill sin and satisfy the wrath of God but ... He did not stay dead - He rose up again and swallowed death up in victory!
That victory has purchased our ability to live a life where there is no longer an obligation to sin ... and we can live amazing lives filled with the Spirit - where streams of living water flow out of us. We no longer have to live in defeat, but instead we are given power to overcome in the Holy Spirit.
That is the life I want ... a life with the answer provided and purchased, and given. Why are there still so many believers living in defeat, living as if Christ has not come? Not too long ago I was one of them - praise God He came to rescue me out of the major lie I had bought into!
Now the problem remains - how do I share the good news with my friend - who so desperately needs to know the WHOLE truth? I do not know - I am excited to see what the Spirit provides when the time comes. The resurrection has already happened - may we all learn how to walk in it.
What good is a discussion of any problem - if we are left with no solution. Jesus came to tell us we are indeed sinners who have walked away from God but He came with the solution! He came to die on the cross and kill sin and satisfy the wrath of God but ... He did not stay dead - He rose up again and swallowed death up in victory!
That victory has purchased our ability to live a life where there is no longer an obligation to sin ... and we can live amazing lives filled with the Spirit - where streams of living water flow out of us. We no longer have to live in defeat, but instead we are given power to overcome in the Holy Spirit.
That is the life I want ... a life with the answer provided and purchased, and given. Why are there still so many believers living in defeat, living as if Christ has not come? Not too long ago I was one of them - praise God He came to rescue me out of the major lie I had bought into!
Now the problem remains - how do I share the good news with my friend - who so desperately needs to know the WHOLE truth? I do not know - I am excited to see what the Spirit provides when the time comes. The resurrection has already happened - may we all learn how to walk in it.
Monday, November 5, 2012
close
I am still praying for a vision of Jesus, praying for my spiritual eyes to be fixed totally on Jesus. So that my heart can explode in worship for His amazing beauty, majesty, and glory. And I am still pondering what it means to let myself go totally to receive the blessings of His pleasure - like He was teaching me last week.
This last weekend, I had an intense discussion with my husband about my spiritual state and of course my sex drive. It drives him nuts that they are tied up together - especially because he sees me praying and pursuing the Lord 'more than anyone I know' - as he put it, 'and yet God does not give you what you want.' Then he asked - 'Why wouldn't God want to give you what you want - when what you want is more of Him?'
Surprisingly - I had an answer. The Lord spoke it through me at my recent Bible/book study on Absolute Surrender. I was telling the women about my 'Summer of Jesus' - about the fullness that I felt - the utter completion, joy and worship. And one woman asked 'well then why don't you have that now?' I said that the Lord had removed His presence because I was not ready for it. He gave it to me as a grand, remarkable taste - so that when He removed His presence I would know what I was heading toward every day after ... because He had a hard journey of major purging and pruning to do in me. And He wanted to me to know how amazingly He loves me, and what He wants our relationship to look like in the future. Fullness is available! He has it waiting for us! If we will just let Him strip away all the crap that is in the way!
I realized afresh that night with my husband how much I am longing for God to come and fill me again. We ended up praying together - my husband aloud - but I could not. I was a blubbering mess - pouring out my soul to the Lord for what seemed like forever. I heaved sobs while my husband clung to me. Just telling the Lord how much I missed Him. I realized as I was praying that the Lord has been very present - when I minister to other people. When I am at church, or leading a study, or praying with someone, or counseling them ... and I am glad and grateful for being full of Him for others. I love that... but I realized during that prayer that I want Him to come and fill me up for me and my family.
I have been struggling so much with my sin - food, anger, disobedience ... but what I want is to be filled with the fruit of the spirit... love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. This can not be conjured up in the flesh ... no matter how hard I try, my flesh can not do eternal work. And even if my flesh was pretty - like some people I know who seem nice no matter what! - if it is done in the flesh - it is still flesh - it is not pleasing to God - and it is not eternal work.
I want to move and walk in the Spirit - all the time! I want the streams of living water to flow out of me - all that fullness to land on my husband, kids - AND everyone else. I want my face to glow with the glory of Jesus, I want joy, and love to abound in me. I want to rejoice in wild praise. I want to feel His fullness all the time!
And here is the great part ... I know that what I am asking for is what Jesus wants to give me! I am not asking for too much - no way - I asking for just what He has promised! And He has the power to keep it alive in me and growing ... We worship an omnipotent God - almighty - all-powerful! So why would He not provide the power to keep the promises supplied. This IS amazing truth. And we all need to stop expecting so little from our God who promises so much!
Bring it on Jesus - strip whatever you need to off, and fill me up with the streams of living water!
This last weekend, I had an intense discussion with my husband about my spiritual state and of course my sex drive. It drives him nuts that they are tied up together - especially because he sees me praying and pursuing the Lord 'more than anyone I know' - as he put it, 'and yet God does not give you what you want.' Then he asked - 'Why wouldn't God want to give you what you want - when what you want is more of Him?'
Surprisingly - I had an answer. The Lord spoke it through me at my recent Bible/book study on Absolute Surrender. I was telling the women about my 'Summer of Jesus' - about the fullness that I felt - the utter completion, joy and worship. And one woman asked 'well then why don't you have that now?' I said that the Lord had removed His presence because I was not ready for it. He gave it to me as a grand, remarkable taste - so that when He removed His presence I would know what I was heading toward every day after ... because He had a hard journey of major purging and pruning to do in me. And He wanted to me to know how amazingly He loves me, and what He wants our relationship to look like in the future. Fullness is available! He has it waiting for us! If we will just let Him strip away all the crap that is in the way!
I realized afresh that night with my husband how much I am longing for God to come and fill me again. We ended up praying together - my husband aloud - but I could not. I was a blubbering mess - pouring out my soul to the Lord for what seemed like forever. I heaved sobs while my husband clung to me. Just telling the Lord how much I missed Him. I realized as I was praying that the Lord has been very present - when I minister to other people. When I am at church, or leading a study, or praying with someone, or counseling them ... and I am glad and grateful for being full of Him for others. I love that... but I realized during that prayer that I want Him to come and fill me up for me and my family.
I have been struggling so much with my sin - food, anger, disobedience ... but what I want is to be filled with the fruit of the spirit... love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. This can not be conjured up in the flesh ... no matter how hard I try, my flesh can not do eternal work. And even if my flesh was pretty - like some people I know who seem nice no matter what! - if it is done in the flesh - it is still flesh - it is not pleasing to God - and it is not eternal work.
I want to move and walk in the Spirit - all the time! I want the streams of living water to flow out of me - all that fullness to land on my husband, kids - AND everyone else. I want my face to glow with the glory of Jesus, I want joy, and love to abound in me. I want to rejoice in wild praise. I want to feel His fullness all the time!
And here is the great part ... I know that what I am asking for is what Jesus wants to give me! I am not asking for too much - no way - I asking for just what He has promised! And He has the power to keep it alive in me and growing ... We worship an omnipotent God - almighty - all-powerful! So why would He not provide the power to keep the promises supplied. This IS amazing truth. And we all need to stop expecting so little from our God who promises so much!
Bring it on Jesus - strip whatever you need to off, and fill me up with the streams of living water!
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