Eve's curse and promise - a seed that will crush Satan ... Jesus came about 4,000 years later.
.... she had Able and then Seth in the mean time.
Noah waited 120 years before the flood.
Abraham's promise was land, seed, and a nation ... Isaac came 25 years later. The nation - 250 years, the land - around 400 years, and the faithful nation 4,000 years later.
Joseph had to wait 22 years before he saw his dreams brought to reality.
The Israelites were in Egypt for 400 years until the Lord sent Moses.
They wandered for 40 years.
Hannah had to wait many years for her prayers to have a child.
David had to wait more than 20 years until He was able to take his rightful place on the throne.
The Israelites were exiled to Babylon for 80 years before they returned to the land.
There was 400 years between Malachi and John the Baptist.
From Jesus until now more than 2,000 years.
Hebrews 11: 3-16, 32-40
3 All these people were still living by faith when they died.
They did not receive the things promised;
they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance,
admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth.
14 People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. 15 If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. 16 Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.
32 And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson and Jephthah, about David and Samuel and the prophets, 33 who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, 34 quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies. 35 Women received back their dead, raised to life again. There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection. 36 Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. 37 They were put to death by stoning;[e] they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— 38 the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.
39 These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, 40 since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.
I confess I suck at waiting. If I had lived in one of the long periods of 400 years of waiting - I think I would have given up on the Lord. I am waiting on promises from the Lord, but I am really realizing that I may never see them here in the land of the living. And if I do see them they may take a long time to get here. I confess I am extremely discouraged by this. I have been lashing out at God calling Him stingy and generally feeling faithless. I do not want to stay in this place but I am needing God to come and fill me with faith once again. I have just today begun to confess my unbelief as sin ... so we will see what the Lord does with me.
Monday, January 28, 2013
neck and feet
NECK
Acts 7:51
“You stiff-necked people! Your hearts and ears are still uncircumcised. You are just like your ancestors: You always resist the Holy Spirit!
2 Chronicles 36:13
He also rebelled against King Nebuchadnezzar, who had made him take an oath in God’s name. He became stiff-necked and hardened his heart and would not turn to the Lord, the God of Israel.
Nehemiah 9:17
They refused to listen and failed to remember the miracles you performed among them. They became stiff-necked and in their rebellion appointed a leader in order to return to their slavery. But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. Therefore you did not desert them,
FEET
1 Samuel 2:9
He will guard the feet of his faithful servants, but the wicked will be silenced in the place of darkness.“It is not by strength that one prevails;
2 Samuel 22:34
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he causes me to stand on the heights.
2 Samuel 22:37
You provide a broad path for my feet, so that my ankles do not give way.
2 Kings 21:8
I will not again make the feet of the Israelites wander from the land I gave their ancestors, if only they will be careful to do everything I commanded them and will keep the whole Law that my servant Moses gave them.”
Nehemiah 9:21
For forty years you sustained them in the wilderness; they lacked nothing, their clothes did not wear out nor did their feet become swollen.
Psalm 25:15
My eyes are ever on the Lord, for only he will release my feet from the snare.
Psalm 40:2
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.
Isaiah 52:7
How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, “Your God reigns!”
Jeremiah 14:10
This is what the Lord says about this people:“They greatly love to wander; they do not restrain their feet. So the Lord does not accept them; he will now remember their wickedness and punish them for their sins.”
John 13:6
He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?”
“Then, Lord,” Simon Peter replied, “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!”
Acts 7:51
“You stiff-necked people! Your hearts and ears are still uncircumcised. You are just like your ancestors: You always resist the Holy Spirit!
2 Chronicles 36:13
He also rebelled against King Nebuchadnezzar, who had made him take an oath in God’s name. He became stiff-necked and hardened his heart and would not turn to the Lord, the God of Israel.
Nehemiah 9:17
They refused to listen and failed to remember the miracles you performed among them. They became stiff-necked and in their rebellion appointed a leader in order to return to their slavery. But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. Therefore you did not desert them,
FEET
1 Samuel 2:9
He will guard the feet of his faithful servants, but the wicked will be silenced in the place of darkness.“It is not by strength that one prevails;
2 Samuel 22:34
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he causes me to stand on the heights.
2 Samuel 22:37
You provide a broad path for my feet, so that my ankles do not give way.
2 Kings 21:8
I will not again make the feet of the Israelites wander from the land I gave their ancestors, if only they will be careful to do everything I commanded them and will keep the whole Law that my servant Moses gave them.”
Nehemiah 9:21
For forty years you sustained them in the wilderness; they lacked nothing, their clothes did not wear out nor did their feet become swollen.
Psalm 25:15
My eyes are ever on the Lord, for only he will release my feet from the snare.
Psalm 40:2
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.
Isaiah 52:7
How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, “Your God reigns!”
Jeremiah 14:10
This is what the Lord says about this people:“They greatly love to wander; they do not restrain their feet. So the Lord does not accept them; he will now remember their wickedness and punish them for their sins.”
John 13:6
He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?”
“No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.” Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.”
Hebrews 12:13
“Make level paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.
“Make level paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
jacob
A friend emailed me to pray. Her husband is in pain. I hardly knew what to say. I am in pain too - and I am wondering why we have to be in so much pain. What is it for?
I was reading an article online on N.P.R. It is about all the young people today - those under 30 claiming 'none' for their religious affiliation on forms etc. I guess the number has risen drastically. Honestly, it doesn't surprise me - it makes me sad - just not surprised. People move away from the Lord because He is hard to know and understand when all they see is pain and suffering in life - and are told that all the things that make us feel better are really just wrong or bad - and not what God wants for us. I really get that. Because I do the same. exact. thing.
When God is hard to know, hear, or reach - I run to all my idols too. I want to throw away everything and just eat and sit in front of the TV all day and pretend that nothing really matters but how I feel right now. Life is hard ... even though on the outside my life looks good - maybe even easy to some - yet I rarely feel good, encouraged, happy, or full. And I really hate that about me.
I am sick of my own spiritual form of whining. It's funny that I feel like I whine here in print way more that I whine in person - I almost never whine - I hate it. I am tired of my wavering faith set in my circumstances rather than in the character of God. If He never changes - then I really should have more faith to rest in the truth of His love. Instead I feel pain, I see pain, I wake up tired, I stub my toe, and I am back at the beginning wondering where God is again - again!
I want this elusive rest ... I can't strive to get it though. Hebrews talks of unbelief keeping us from our rest. Well than I am swimming in unbelief regularly.
I realized this morning as I praying that I am a lot like Jacob. I wrestle. I wrestle with God trying to get Him to bless me. Just bless me! Take away my pain! Make me feel better! Take away the fog in my brain! Free me from my addiction! Make life easy! Be present! Be obvious! Be clear!
Jacob at least got to touch God and see His face in the early morning light. But did God bless him? It seems to me God had already blessed him. He had a bunch of wives, tons of kids, a zillion animals - he was rich ... God had blessed him even though he was a big pain in the butt. But obviously Jacob wanted more. Just like I always want more! He wanted peace - He wanted rest... and He didn't feel like he had those things. Laban was just chasing him on one side - and he settles that only to see Esau coming at him and wondering if he was going to kill his entire family. It is pain on all sides ... no rest in sight - at least that is what Jacob sees.
Jacob can not know that as Esau is coming with his army - he is coming to greet him and welcome him home. Jacob is too busy clinging to his fear - not to the Lord. He is focused on his sins of the past and not all the blessings that God has already provided. The lack of thankfulness has clouded Jacob. His mind is darkened and confused. Fear is reigning in him. He sees only bad when God has brought everything together to bring peace. Jacob doesn't see the big picture - he is trapped in the moment.
That is me - trapped in the moment. Trapped in the moment wanting what I want now. Not clinging to God's bigger picture. I have no sense of the big story when I am focused on the food in front of me - or the pain that is troubling me. All I see is now. When will I stop wrestling and finally see what God is already doing all around me - when will that be a consistent part of me - that steadfast faith in God's character and love? I need a bigger vision - a vision of Jesus - High and Lifted Up - WAY bigger than me - that has to be my fixed point - it has to be what I reference all of life from. Me and my wants are still so central.
Use my pain, Lord - use everything to teach me how to see You. May I rest in You and nothing else.
I was reading an article online on N.P.R. It is about all the young people today - those under 30 claiming 'none' for their religious affiliation on forms etc. I guess the number has risen drastically. Honestly, it doesn't surprise me - it makes me sad - just not surprised. People move away from the Lord because He is hard to know and understand when all they see is pain and suffering in life - and are told that all the things that make us feel better are really just wrong or bad - and not what God wants for us. I really get that. Because I do the same. exact. thing.
When God is hard to know, hear, or reach - I run to all my idols too. I want to throw away everything and just eat and sit in front of the TV all day and pretend that nothing really matters but how I feel right now. Life is hard ... even though on the outside my life looks good - maybe even easy to some - yet I rarely feel good, encouraged, happy, or full. And I really hate that about me.
I am sick of my own spiritual form of whining. It's funny that I feel like I whine here in print way more that I whine in person - I almost never whine - I hate it. I am tired of my wavering faith set in my circumstances rather than in the character of God. If He never changes - then I really should have more faith to rest in the truth of His love. Instead I feel pain, I see pain, I wake up tired, I stub my toe, and I am back at the beginning wondering where God is again - again!
I want this elusive rest ... I can't strive to get it though. Hebrews talks of unbelief keeping us from our rest. Well than I am swimming in unbelief regularly.
I realized this morning as I praying that I am a lot like Jacob. I wrestle. I wrestle with God trying to get Him to bless me. Just bless me! Take away my pain! Make me feel better! Take away the fog in my brain! Free me from my addiction! Make life easy! Be present! Be obvious! Be clear!
Jacob at least got to touch God and see His face in the early morning light. But did God bless him? It seems to me God had already blessed him. He had a bunch of wives, tons of kids, a zillion animals - he was rich ... God had blessed him even though he was a big pain in the butt. But obviously Jacob wanted more. Just like I always want more! He wanted peace - He wanted rest... and He didn't feel like he had those things. Laban was just chasing him on one side - and he settles that only to see Esau coming at him and wondering if he was going to kill his entire family. It is pain on all sides ... no rest in sight - at least that is what Jacob sees.
Jacob can not know that as Esau is coming with his army - he is coming to greet him and welcome him home. Jacob is too busy clinging to his fear - not to the Lord. He is focused on his sins of the past and not all the blessings that God has already provided. The lack of thankfulness has clouded Jacob. His mind is darkened and confused. Fear is reigning in him. He sees only bad when God has brought everything together to bring peace. Jacob doesn't see the big picture - he is trapped in the moment.
That is me - trapped in the moment. Trapped in the moment wanting what I want now. Not clinging to God's bigger picture. I have no sense of the big story when I am focused on the food in front of me - or the pain that is troubling me. All I see is now. When will I stop wrestling and finally see what God is already doing all around me - when will that be a consistent part of me - that steadfast faith in God's character and love? I need a bigger vision - a vision of Jesus - High and Lifted Up - WAY bigger than me - that has to be my fixed point - it has to be what I reference all of life from. Me and my wants are still so central.
Use my pain, Lord - use everything to teach me how to see You. May I rest in You and nothing else.
Friday, January 11, 2013
new year
It seems like it is expected to do a 'reflecting on 2012 and expecting in 2013' post. And though I don't typically like to follow rules - that one seems good and right.
I have a lot to be thankful for in the last year - God has done a lot and used me a lot and it was wonderful to be a part of. I saw so much transformation - so many hearts moving closer to Jesus. I heard very words of my prayers for my church and others - words that God had given me to pray - answered in words, sermons, or conversations from others. It was awesome to watch - awesome to hear!
But it seems after the prayer retreat last month that what was my current mission at the time has now come to an end. In fact it seemed like such an abrupt ending that now I feel like I am floundering. In one recent post I reflected on Psalm 81 ... and the Lord told me He would be letting me rest and removing the sword from my hand. It sounds a bit crazy but I have had pain in my shoulder for years now - a knot that would not be unknotted. At times moving my neck at all brought pain ... and now... it feels so much better - like an actual weight has been taken out of my hand. So the burden to pray for my church in the way that I have been, seems to be lifted. God has given me rest from it and is shifting the burden to others now. This is good - not because I don't want to be used but because He needs more people to keep the work moving forward and is expanding His vision to them! I could see for a while now - since the summer - that my vision for this period of time was to end in January ... it was like my spiritual minds eye - just could not see past January... and now I understand more of why that is. He has moved that burden off of me and on to others - to continue on the work.
Honestly, now I do not know what to do with my self. He has removed that vision - and not replaced it yet. And perhaps He won't for a while. But I am still stuck wondering how to spend my time and my prayers. It is hard to explain but as soon as the burden was removed to pray - so was the need inside me. Before, it was imperative - I could not help but pray - it ached to come out. Now I feel almost blank. There is no burn to get things said in prayer ... except for my self.
On the prayer retreat I felt a call to study Hebrews. I have read it a few times over since then and I do hear a call out to me in many verses and in general to understand Jesus as our High Priest. I do not know at all why or what God wants to do in me yet - all I know is that I am meant to dig in. And yet nothing feels like more of a struggle than doing just that.
Last night I just cried out to God. I woke up in pain - restless leg syndrome and my feet hurt - plantar fasciitis. I did not know feet could hurt that much but mine do. And I yelled out to God wondering why I have to be in some sort of regular pain - I am not that old for goodness sake! Is there a reason for it? Does this pain have a mission tied to it like my shoulder? Or is this an attack of satan, or is this some sort of discipline from the Lord that I need to look into. Or is it just pain. I do not know but I asked God to heal me. I have been trying to get my act together again regarding food and exercise - I have been trying to walk on the treadmill and reduce my calories. But I have not spent much time in prayer over it - like I know I am supposed to. And honestly, I generally feel like crap - foggy head, weak tired body, feeling fat and slow, a head cold and then of course the pain - so prayer has not been easy to do - nothing has been easy to do. Nothing about the last few weeks has been easy or particularly productive.
I did not mean for this to turn into a time of complaint ... and when I cried to the Lord last night I did not mean for that to be a complaint either but as I let the tears come - that is what came out with them! I am still longing to see God do miraculous work in my life - in anyone's life! I want to see a miracle! I feel like the mission that He took me off of - though done for me - is not a done work! I never got to see full restoration - I never got to see full revival ... and those are things I feel like the Lord laid on my heart to pray for. And not only did I want then for my church - but for me! I wanted to be healed of my food addiction - yet it is still here with me - and not from lack of prayer and effort in the last year! I wanted to see the Holy Spirit come in ridiculous jaw dropping power and yet - He did not. I saw much that was good - even great but not ALL that God laid on my heart to pray. I want full freedom! And this all seems more like a half way mark.
So what am I to think? What am I to do? What am I to pray? ... the only answer I have so far is - dig into Hebrews. And so with determination I will.
I have a lot to be thankful for in the last year - God has done a lot and used me a lot and it was wonderful to be a part of. I saw so much transformation - so many hearts moving closer to Jesus. I heard very words of my prayers for my church and others - words that God had given me to pray - answered in words, sermons, or conversations from others. It was awesome to watch - awesome to hear!
But it seems after the prayer retreat last month that what was my current mission at the time has now come to an end. In fact it seemed like such an abrupt ending that now I feel like I am floundering. In one recent post I reflected on Psalm 81 ... and the Lord told me He would be letting me rest and removing the sword from my hand. It sounds a bit crazy but I have had pain in my shoulder for years now - a knot that would not be unknotted. At times moving my neck at all brought pain ... and now... it feels so much better - like an actual weight has been taken out of my hand. So the burden to pray for my church in the way that I have been, seems to be lifted. God has given me rest from it and is shifting the burden to others now. This is good - not because I don't want to be used but because He needs more people to keep the work moving forward and is expanding His vision to them! I could see for a while now - since the summer - that my vision for this period of time was to end in January ... it was like my spiritual minds eye - just could not see past January... and now I understand more of why that is. He has moved that burden off of me and on to others - to continue on the work.
Honestly, now I do not know what to do with my self. He has removed that vision - and not replaced it yet. And perhaps He won't for a while. But I am still stuck wondering how to spend my time and my prayers. It is hard to explain but as soon as the burden was removed to pray - so was the need inside me. Before, it was imperative - I could not help but pray - it ached to come out. Now I feel almost blank. There is no burn to get things said in prayer ... except for my self.
On the prayer retreat I felt a call to study Hebrews. I have read it a few times over since then and I do hear a call out to me in many verses and in general to understand Jesus as our High Priest. I do not know at all why or what God wants to do in me yet - all I know is that I am meant to dig in. And yet nothing feels like more of a struggle than doing just that.
Last night I just cried out to God. I woke up in pain - restless leg syndrome and my feet hurt - plantar fasciitis. I did not know feet could hurt that much but mine do. And I yelled out to God wondering why I have to be in some sort of regular pain - I am not that old for goodness sake! Is there a reason for it? Does this pain have a mission tied to it like my shoulder? Or is this an attack of satan, or is this some sort of discipline from the Lord that I need to look into. Or is it just pain. I do not know but I asked God to heal me. I have been trying to get my act together again regarding food and exercise - I have been trying to walk on the treadmill and reduce my calories. But I have not spent much time in prayer over it - like I know I am supposed to. And honestly, I generally feel like crap - foggy head, weak tired body, feeling fat and slow, a head cold and then of course the pain - so prayer has not been easy to do - nothing has been easy to do. Nothing about the last few weeks has been easy or particularly productive.
I did not mean for this to turn into a time of complaint ... and when I cried to the Lord last night I did not mean for that to be a complaint either but as I let the tears come - that is what came out with them! I am still longing to see God do miraculous work in my life - in anyone's life! I want to see a miracle! I feel like the mission that He took me off of - though done for me - is not a done work! I never got to see full restoration - I never got to see full revival ... and those are things I feel like the Lord laid on my heart to pray for. And not only did I want then for my church - but for me! I wanted to be healed of my food addiction - yet it is still here with me - and not from lack of prayer and effort in the last year! I wanted to see the Holy Spirit come in ridiculous jaw dropping power and yet - He did not. I saw much that was good - even great but not ALL that God laid on my heart to pray. I want full freedom! And this all seems more like a half way mark.
So what am I to think? What am I to do? What am I to pray? ... the only answer I have so far is - dig into Hebrews. And so with determination I will.
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