God of thunder

Psalm 18: 7-19
Then the earth quaked and trembled.
    The foundations of the mountains shook;
    they quaked because of his anger.
Smoke poured from his nostrils;
    fierce flames leaped from his mouth.
    Glowing coals blazed forth from him.
He opened the heavens and came down;
    dark storm clouds were beneath his feet.
Mounted on a mighty angelic being, he flew,
    soaring on the wings of the wind.
He shrouded himself in darkness,
    veiling his approach with dark rain clouds.
Thick clouds shielded the brightness around him
    and rained down hail and burning coals.
The Lord thundered from heaven;
    the voice of the Most High resounded
    amid the hail and burning coals.
He shot his arrows and scattered his enemies;
    his lightning flashed, and they were greatly confused.
Then at your command, O Lord,
    at the blast of your breath,
the bottom of the sea could be seen,
    and the foundations of the earth were laid bare.
He reached down from heaven and rescued me;
    he drew me out of deep waters.
He rescued me from my powerful enemies,
    from those who hated me and were too strong for me.
They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress,
    but the Lord supported me.
He led me to a place of safety;
    he rescued me because he delights in me.

I am watching and listening to a storm right now pass over my home. And the Lord feels present in this moment.

This summer has been so difficult. People keep asking how my summer is going and I keep not knowing how to answer. It has been a battle. My interior feels at war. It is hard to think, hard to concentrate, hard to read at times. It has been hard to praise, hard to listen or rather really to hear worship music. Praying has been nearly impossible... I keep trying to do all of these things but there is very little fruit - and it has been so discouraging. Others I know have been going through the same thing as me ... and though I do not wish this on them - I am encouraged to know that I am not crazy - I am not making this up ... it is real. My longing for the Lord is right and good, my desire for His fruit in my life is a good desire. Waiting on Him is good (but so hard).

But in this moment with these verses and this storm - the Lord does feel near. And it is easier to have faith that He does keep His promises and that He does indeed delight in me - that rescue from this whatever it is - is coming! God rain down your promises on me! You are the God of thunder! The God of this storm. Let me KNOW that You delight in me!